Matt and Abrielle flew down to Arizona for Matt’s brother, Trevor’s, wedding. I unfortunately couldn’t go due to work, and this was Matt’s first time flying alone with her. She did great. She sat on this older woman’s lap that Matt was sitting next to the entire time. She’ll love anyone if they have necklaces and a phone 🙂 haha.
Abrielle… oh this girl. She is something, haha. I just keep loving her more than I thought I could. Her and that handsome daddy she has 😉 I’m so grateful that I can be with them, and all of my family, forever. What a truly amazing blessing that is.
She has grown so much in the last 3 months… she really has gone from baby to toddler.
She has started running. She’s very good at shaking her head yes. She’s obsessed with birds and points pretty much every single one out. She’s also obsessed with dogs. Pretty much every time we see one, she almost hyperventilates going “woof woof” and goes spastic patting her hand on her leg (the sign for dog). She knows tons of animal noises. The zoo is a very magical place for us, haha.
She loves to dance and twirl. She loves to eat constantly (still). She’s got such a personality… she truly has no fear – of anything or anyone. A bit nerve-wracking for me, haha. There’s been lots more bumps and bruises and scrapes to go along with the fearlessness. She’s such a big “helper” pushing the shopping cart or stroller or doing laundry. She’s so vocal. She knows exactly what she wants and fortunately is pretty good at communicating it. She loves the water, and for me to put sunscreen on her, haha. She loves rocks and picks one up to carry every time we’re outside. She’s good at brushing her full mouth of teeth. She tries to hold every stuffed animal and blanket that she owns all at once. She is very into riding in/on things right now. She’s also very into jewelry and trying on shoes, haha.
That is Abrielle in a nutshell. I could go on for a long time with funny stories, but at this point I just need to get caught up in my blogging, so that’s the very condensed version of who she is right now, haha. Here are lots of pics to go along with it and hopefully I’ll be better at keeping up to date with stuff. It’s just pretty busy and entertaining and amazing to be her parents.
It has been a difficult adjustment for me to be honest. Not that I dislike it, but I still very much miss the green and water of Western Washington. And I don’t like my job as much as I was anticipating I would either so that probably plays into it. I came from a very critical and busy trauma/surgical ICU and where I’m at now, it’s not nearly the same pace or acuity. So… I’m not sure what I’m going to do about that. Fortunately my position is only a 13 week contract, so I’m only obligated for that period of time, but I’ll have to figure out what I’m going to do after that. I have considered going for the Cardiothoracic ICU there; it would be a new specialty for me. Anyway, I think another part of it is the schedule; they’re having me switch between days and nights frequently and it’s just killing my body. And yet another reason why it’s difficult to be here is because it reminds me of my dad. He spent a good part of his life here, a very influential part, and he has always always loved Colorado. So, it’s just a hard reminder. But… it is beautiful in many ways and the people have been good and it’s nice to have hot weather again. Although my skin is certainly not used to it anymore, haha.
And despite my issues with being here, I better get used to it because we just bought a house! Yea! Finally! It will be our first home that we’ve owned and actually lived in. It’s in Littleton, but on the outskirts of the city in a developing community. It actually reminds me a lot of where I grew up. I’m going to have to get used to driving more than 5 minutes to get to a mall, haha. I realize how very spoiled I was in Bellevue having pretty much everything within a 3 mile radius. We are about a 15 minute drive from society (a Costco! haha) so it will take some adjusting, but overall I am very excited about our new home. It will be a wonderful place for us to grow into.
Well, a lot has happened in the last 3 months….
The most significant event has been the passing of my father, Charles H. Miller. He struggled with multiple chronic illnesses for over a decade and his body was just tired. He passed on April 27. It was a peaceful passing and I’m grateful that he was surrounded by his family.
To be honest, it still doesn’t seem real most days. But when I still think about calling him or we go to NM and he’s not there, reality hits me harder than I can handle and I just crumble for a time. For his sake, it was much more merciful for him to go and I am excited for him and what I imagine he is accomplishing on the other side. I am happy that he is at peace. He was not afraid of death and I admire his faith and understanding. But for me…. my dad has been one of my best friends and my go-to-guy for pretty much everything since I was 16 years old. He is my hero. I am very much my father’s daughter, and am honored to be so, but it’s just so hard as I feel a very literal piece of who I am is gone. He always pushed me (in an uplifting way) to live up to my potential and has been with me through the best and worst of my times. His confidence in me and love for me (as well as my mother’s) has very much shaped me into who I am. I am lucky to have had his influence and example in my life and I’m not sure that I’ll ever match up to the person he was. But I couldn’t have asked for a better father and friend and I am just so grateful that he was with us as long as he was. Even if it was for just a short 27 years of my life, his influence will continue to impact and shape me forever.
Dad’s sickness started off with a virus that attacked his heart when he was 50. He had been extremely healthy and fit up to that point. The endocarditis led to heart failure and he developed several other ailments along the way, such as arthritis and diabetes. He also had a condition called systemic scleroderma; a hardening of the skin and organs that made it even more difficult for him to move around and function. In addition, he had nonalcoholic cirrhosis. This and his heart failure caused organomegaly (enlarging of all his organs) and essentially he had multiple organ dysfunction syndrome. He was truly miserable (physically) and exhausted most of the time and he would often wonder the purpose of his still being kept on this earth. He’d chalk it up to the saying “you can’t kill a cockroach”. He was anything but that, but despite being afflicted with so much, his body was very strong and held out as long as it could. Eventually liver and kidney failure became irreversible.
The funeral was held on May 1. He was buried in the Sunset Gardens Memorial Park in Albuquerque, NM. It’s interesting, dad didn’t think very many people would come to his funeral, but the chapel was full and lots of people came in from out of state. He was a loved man by many people. It was a beautiful service and a time of great healing for his family. I hope that all of us can honorably carry on his legacy.
I am unable to describe the gratitude that I feel for the gospel of Jesus Christ. I have been sealed to my father and family forever and at times, that is the only reassurance that can bring me peace and comfort. I know I will see him again. I am very saddened that most of my mortal life will be without him on this earth, but there is so much joy in knowing that it will be but a short time in the scheme of things. There is so much more I could say and there would never enough to suffice, but I will just say that I love him and miss him so much everyday and I hope that I can live a life that would make him proud.
I just want to say thank you to anyone/everyone who came to honor my father and for all of the love and condolences that you gave to us. My family is grateful to have and know so many wonderful people. We truly felt loved and supported and I offer my deepest appreciation. Thank you.